My Year Out

Building a bridge between sketchbooks and final artwork

When I started in publishing I was like sponge, taking on all the advice I was given. It was a very exciting time and I had some success with those early books.

But a few books down the line and I didn’t even recognise myself in my work anymore. I was bent out of shape.

My work had become flatter - I mean that literally flat: areas of flat bright colour with no texture or depth.

It made it hard to express emotion in my stories and I felt trapped.

If I wrote a story with some sadness or chaos I had no idea how to illustrate it. And I was being offered very sweet texts that made me feel misunderstood as a person. That sounds dramatic, but that is how it felt.

So I made the decision to take a year out. I was lucky because my early books had earned me some good royalties and I had put some money aside. There was enough to get by if I had a very frugal year, eating mostly soup and pasta.

I went back to my sketchbooks and worked on building a bridge between my sketchbook work and my picture book work. I wanted my illustrations to have as much energy, personality and feelings as my drawings from life.

I also started psychotherapy to explore why I was so eager to please and why I couldn’t stand my ground in creative differences. This was back in about 2006 when nobody was having therapy. Confidence or self care wasn’t something discussed when I was at art school. It wasn’t even considered part of the tool box, which I think is strange when I look back now.

So it felt like a big deal and very scary, but it was an amazing time: completely life changing, not just for my illustration work but for my life as a whole.

It was a nerve wracking time because, ‘what if publishers didn’t like my new work?’

But there was no need to worry, publishers could see the energy and personality in my new work — and that I was having a lovely time and that’s exactly what publishers want to see.

The next book I illustrated after my break was Fleabag. It has texture and movement, and I could illustrate sadness or dark moments. It felt good to make a book I felt genuinely proud of.

I wish I had known that publishers want you to be your authentic self, and there is a bridge between sketchbooks, rough drawings and final artwork. So to help you bridge your gap, or to help you overcome your picture book problems, I made you a PICTURE BOOK COURSE packed with all the stuff I wish I had known back then.

The PICTURE BOOK COURSE doors are open now, and earlybirds — people who join before Art Club on Friday 4th July — get special Good Ship stickers and early access to our ANCHORING YOUR IDEAS film.

Have you ever felt trapped by your own work? Have you worked on building a bridge between your sketchbooks and your final artwork? I would love to hear about it.

Helenx

P.S. Here’s a wee film of me tidying up while I talk about this time.